Close your eyes and picture Edinburgh. What do you see?
Noise, street performers, cobbles, young posh faces shouting about 5 stars, me hunched outside a café trying not to turn to vapour
What is the last thing that made you snort with laughter?
Cardinal Burns live, doing their Mancunian drug casualties sketch. The men are genius
Tell us about this year’s show.
It’s about loss and acceptance I think. Trying to retrace my steps, work out where it all went so ‘right’. But I don’t do heavy weight subjects very well so there’s a lot of dodging going on.
Who do you want to see this year?
Rob Auton, John Kearns, Rose Matafeo
Do you have any Edinburgh Fringe traditions?
Watch Rob Auton’s new show, eat macaroons, go to the Victorian swimming pool, hang around in the Loft Bar far too much, look for places to dance and fail for the first three weeks and then parties miraculously start appearing in week 4.
What is your getting ready music?
80’s synth – Yazoo, Depeche Mode, New Order or jingly indie – House of Love, Stone Roses
If you could have any guest in your show, who would it be?
Cardinal Burns. Though I might be intimidated by them and forget who I am or some other stage blank
What is the best backhanded compliment you have had?
‘That was great, I was doing that kitchen cupboards joke 10 years ago, it’s great to see it come back around’ (Well known comedian). I asked him to tell me his version but he didn’t want to. His work had been done.
Who made you howl with laughter when you were a child?
Bobby Davro, Vic and Bob, Jerry Lewis
What should Donald Trump know?
That he is not special, it’s a misunderstanding within his brain. And that those closest to him don’t love him they just like noise and confidence and money
What do you do in Edinburgh that your parents wouldn´t approve of?
Dress up as my mum on stage and talk about her son Tom wanking in sheds as a teenager
Catch Tom Ward: Love Machine at 3.40pm at Just the Tonic at the Tron throughout August